Stuck in a Rut?

Feeling like you’re stuck in a rut these days? Feel down and depleted and like a flat tire, and not your usual self? Here’s some ideas to lift you out of the mud and spinning your wheels on ground again.

There’s a lot of reasons for being stuck. First, it is possible that you aren’t enjoying something major in your life, whether that’s your relationship or your work? Do you hate waking up in the morning because you don’t want to face that certain someone or something? I know when I was employed, and not working for myself, I dreaded going to work because I knw I wasn’t living my passion, what I was meant to do, which was to have a counseling practice for men and couples.

Second, it’s possible that you are experiencing depression, or at least the blues. Sometimes, depression is biochemical in nature, but just as often it’s a reaction to a situation or an environment that we think we have no power over, yet feel helpless to change it. We resort to depressing about it because it’s easier in some senses than to take action, or even know how to take action. Now, now, I’m not saying that people always choose depression, but I want you to consider that it’s one of several contributing factors to depression. Biochemical or nutritional imbalances can be as much to blame, as well as other lifestyle factors.

Third, do you know what you really want? Are you living your life aligned with your values – what you blieve in and the way you really see your life being lived (without all those messy mental constraints you put up). If your self-critic wasn’t saying “no, no, no” to everything, what would your life look like? Is being in a rut an expression of giving into that “no, no, no” and not enough “yes, yes, yes”? I doubt you’d be stuck in a rut if you were living your life saying “yes, yes, yes.”

Sometimes situations keep us in a rut, but, as Victor Frankl (well, and the Buddhists) say, it’s our perception of events that we have control over, not the actual events. So, how can you make lemons out of lemonade if life keeps you in a holding pattern right now?

If we listen closely to our inner voice, our true nature, we usually come up with a lot of good things. We know because we listen inside, not outside. It’s hard to be in a rut when we listen to that inner knowing, which almost always knows the answer. Meditate on it, and see what comes up.

I hope this helps you spin right out of the mud onto the road that awaits you.

About Jason

As "The Man That Men Will Talk To," Jason Fierstein, MA, LPC is a private practice counselor and psychotherapist for men and couples in the greater Phoenix, Arizona, area. He works with struggling men to find happiness in their lives, and with their wives.
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